in The WAITING ROOM

I remember that a few years ago a friend of mine posted that as she and her husband were dealing with his cancer diagnosis she was waiting on God.  That insight stuck with me and now here I am, waiting.  I have not been here before but know this is exactly where God has me.  I am not sure why I am here but as I talk with friends that are also in a waiting pattern he is teaching Me, well, all of us, to trust Him.  Proverbs 3:5-6 says: "Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and DO NOT lean on your own understanding.  In all of your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths."  That was the 1st verse I memorized and the verse that my agency Buckner Child and Family Services has as their verse as well.  You see, I am waiting for a child.  A child that may or may not have already been born, but will need me as their mommy. God has called me to adopt and as I write this on paper  it becomes more real.  Even more real than the home study and the countless hours in classes and getting paper work done. I am a licensed foster parent and I am expecting.  I have no idea what the gender is or when he or she or, God help me, they will come.  All I know is that God said to do it and I took a huge leap of faith and finished the classes, paperwork, fingerprints, CPR and home study and now I am ready.  Sometimes I wonder if the reason this is taking so long for me to get a child is because God didn't tell me to but, until the door is completely closed, I am going to move forward.  I am going to walk in the path He has for me and right now it is waiting.  So while I wait....I will keep singing, I will keep studying, I will keep teaching, I will keep praising him.  All of this while I wait for Him to move.

Part of Dr. Seuss's book Oh, the Places You'll Go says this: 

The Waiting Place... 

...for people just waiting. 
Waiting for a train to go 
or a bus to come, or a plane to go 
or the mail to come, or the rain to go 
or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow 
or waiting around for a Yes or a No 
or waiting for their hair to grow. 
Everyone is just waiting. 

Waiting for the fish to bite 
or waiting for wind to fly a kite 
or waiting around for Friday night 
or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake 
or a pot to boil, or a Better Break 
or a sting of pearls, or a pair of pants 
or a wig with curls, or Another Chance. 
Everyone is just waiting. 

But, God said it best. 
2 Corinthians 12: 9-10
9And He has said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness." Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me.10Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong. 



Hence the title of my Blog.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!

This year was the 9th Mother's Day since my mom died.  I am usually okay until some sweet person walks up to me and tells me they are praying for me or thinking about me on this day.  I am also usually okay until someone prays for "those that have lost children or their moms." Then... I lose it and it us an ugly cry.  My eyes get blood shot and my makeup does not hold up well. Dang it Mom, why did you leave us?
The only thing that made this mother's day bearable was that I got to wish my sister Happy Mother's Day! She is the step-mom of a 16 year old girl and this sweet girl is exactly what Heather needed.

So Happy Momma's Day to all of the mom's out there. You have an unbelievable job and I cannot wait to join the ranks.

Hey....It's been a while!

Long time, No see!  I am going to start again.  I figured this and exercise will keep my mind occupied.
I think this may last longer than the exercise because it is getting hot here in H-Town again.

It has been about 2 years since I last wrote. A lot has happened since then and all is well now. In a quick list here it goes: low hemoglobin, blood transfusion, joined dating sites, met a boy, turned 40, had a party, went to Israel, Went to Spain, broke up with boy, had major surgery, 2nd transfusion, and now teaching 4th grade! Oh yeah and because of my "dating site" adventure. My sister also met a boy and now she is married and a step mom. That is the last 2 years in a nutshell. I began a new adventure am teaching 4th grade. I have taught 1st grade for 19 years and now after a tough year with 2 co-workers, I am moving up! I have, what I am calling,  "The Dream Job." I am teaching 4th grade Science and Social Studies only. And now.... this amazing whirlwind of a school year is almost over,  it is MAY 2014 and I am 42!!!
What the HECK??????
The best part of this is this isn't the reason I am blogging again....MORE TO COME!!!!

SUMMERTIME!!!

The living is easy this summer. I have a few workshops I am going to. I am tutoring and have even managed to cook a few times. Yes, Summertime is here and the living is sure easy at the Sanders' Casa.

My Lord and My God

I am just finally calming down from of an amazing Easter Weekend. It began on Good Friday sitting under the teaching of David Platt. I was part of a simulcast called The Secret Church. It challenged me in ways that rendered me speechless most times and took me several days to process what he taught. He is a brilliant man of God and I did realize I am reading the wrong books. Visit secretchurch.org to see what I am talking about.

Then Sunday at church we had a great service based on our members "Cardboard Testimonies." On one side people wrote about their lives before Christ or perhaps something they struggled with then on the other side they wrote what God did in their lives. I was singing or attempting to sing in the choir so I didn't show one on the stage but mine would have said Side A: Devastated by death and divorce Side B: Jesus Restored my Joy and Life. This was an amazing way to celebrate Easter with my church family.
The title of today's blog are the words of Thomas the disciple after he saw the hands and feet of Jesus. I cannot begin to comprehend what Jesus did for me on the cross but those are the words I do understand. My Lord and My God.

There has been more devastating weather in our world this time it is here in the states and I pray that God gets our attention and we listen to what He has to say. There is a lot of devastation I am praying for those involved and I also pray that we, as Americans, pay attention to His call.

Spring Break

So Valentine's day has now been over for exactly one month. I don't have any feeling one way or another, however the V Day party on Monday made for the longest week since creation. I had one suitor and he made me a cake and brought over a card. The problem is I do not have an emotional connection with him. Now there is another friend in Dallas that I may or may not have spoken about before, He is a sweet guy but not ready for a "relationship." He is so stinking cute but again not anything to write about. {Edit: there may be something soon but for now...} We had something before in a past life but now we are good friends. A friend of mine said "you don't need another buddy" last week but she is wrong. You can never have too many friends. That's how we increase the kingdom for God by iron sharpening iron. As I sit here in my friends house in Dallas, I got 3 phone calls from friends from home while I was here, I love those friends and had I not let them in my life as "buddies" they wouldn't have been there to encourage me I needed it. I mean, seriously, my dog died this week. They all knew how much I loved her.
Anyway, this is the 3rd time I've attempted to finish this post, and now it it is almost spring break. Praise God for Spring Break. I am so ready.

NEW YEAR!!!!

...I also want to get married. I want kids and I want a Chocolate Lab or Doberman.

I also am restless again. I have no idea what is in store. I have been restless for a year or so and have no idea what or why I am. But my theme so far this year is Be Still! Yep that is the cry. Be Still.

As a teacher I have the luxury of having 2 “new years “ One in January and one in August. That means that I also have 2 end of the years. So right now I want to be still at least until the end of the year May and then recalculate and see what happens next.

Today I have been challenged more by the question: What is my Motivation? Is it by the Joy of God or the joy of man?
Listen to John Piper's message from Passion Atlanta. HERE